I am a mother....

i cook, i clean, i do laundry, i take care of the kids, i take care of the dogs. i do EVERYTHING. when im sick...i dont have someone waiting on me hand and foot...when im sick i still get up and still cook and clean and do laundry and take care of the kids and the dogs....i SHOW my children how to organize their rooms and put things away...but no...i get them shoving everything under their beds and into their closets...trash all over their floors and strings hanging from the ceilings and lamps...i get clean clothes mixed with dirty clothes so i have to wash everything all over again....i get asked if i need help when im already almost done with what im doing....i shouldn't have to ASK for help from my kids or my husband...they should OFFER to help me or better yet if they see something that needs to be done and i have not gotten to it...to just DO IT...instead of waiting and EXPECTING me to do it.....its all i feel like im EXPECTED to do it all...i get out of my house alone or just with my husband maybe once every 2-3 months...and maybe a couple of times do i actually get to the grocery store ALONE...or other household errands that i must run....i dont have the luxury of having someone watch my kids every weekend like a lot of mothers i know....not that i would want to go out EVERY weekend...because i AM a mother first and foremost...but to get out once or twice a month without the kids....would do a world of good for my sanity and make me a better mother (and i really dont understand how some mothers can go out ALL the time leaving their kids to go party it up and get drunk every weekend...to me that shows a serious lack of responsibility)...cause right now im so closed up in this house away from everything but the mess of the house that i no longer have any desire to clean up....that i have no care if the world if it stays a mess...but i still try to clean it up as to not make my husband upset....but sometimes it just too much and i get so sick and tired of doing it ALL...i get asked...why not have the kids help...well that is pretty pointless cause of the reasons stated eariler...it doesn't GET CLEANED!!!!!!! i am so burnt out right now...i want to scream and cry...and im jealous....of those mothers who get to go out every once in a while...those who have sitters for their kids....those who have family members that would be willing to watch their kids...grandparents who would watch their kids if even for an hour or two...yeah i do that that SOMETIMES...but it happens very rarely and when it does happen i do cherish it and love it up....but it happens maybe 2 or 3 times a YEAR....and im jealous of my husband....who can go out at the drop of a hat....he gets invites to go out all the time and he doesn't have to worry about staying home with the kids...cause its MY JOB.....he can go out with friends...hang out....and when he asks me to come along the responsibility of finding a sitter falls ONTO ME....rarely will he help me find a sitter...it makes me feel as if he doesn't WANT me to go...i feel that if he did he would put forth the effort to help me find a sitter....its stirring up some resentment in me that i am just not liking...and i dont know what to do!!!!